We often think about serving ourselves as ultimately selfish. Yes it is. That is the nature of living in a body in this life. I am the only one that can get all my needs and desires met. I am the only one charged with doing so. My life, my responsibility and my energy to spend as I wish.
Loving myself is where everything starts. In order to even have a desire I must care about how I feel and what I want in order to meet that need. So loving myself is selfish and required. And being selfish in this way is good. Being selfish at the expense of others is not.
So striving to meet my needs without damaging others is where its at. One fo these needs is a need to feel apart of something and to feel significant. To want and to drive towards the approval of my tribe. Accomplishments have always been a great way to win the approval of others. This serves a good purpose in our relationships with others. But it also helps us feel worthy of the praise and love that we so badly desire from out tribe.
It seems to me that in order to gain my tribe’s approval I have to be selfish enough to achieve something worthy of praise and selfish enough to love myself in order to drive myself selfishly towards these ends even if so much stands in my way.
So I wonder, is seeking approval selfish? It sounds like it is in order to fulfill it. What do you think? Is this good? Is this bad?
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